


50 Layers of Green

by alienby



Category: Shrek Series
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2017-07-01
Packaged: 2018-07-22 04:31:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7419865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alienby/pseuds/alienby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shrek and Donkey's lives fall apart as their relationships crumble around them</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Not in Mah Swamp

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to contributors from Camp Lightbulb 2016-2017

Shrek woke up like he would any other morning- his wife by his side, his triplets in the other room, and the sun shining through the window. Things were magically quiet at 6 in the morning, and Shrek liked it that way. The kids would usually wake up around eight, as would Fiona, so he had some time to himself.  
Shrek hauled himself out of bed, got dressed, and headed into the main room of the house. It smelled like swamp, just how he liked it. Shrek made and poured a cup of coffee- something he had taken back from Far Far Away- then took a seat in his favorite chair.  
Shrek’s view outside was ruined by Donkey.  
“DONKEY,” Shrek hollered as he threw his coffee cup out the window and hit Donkey with it, “WHAT, ARE YOU DOIN, IN MAH SWAMP?”  
Donkey, who had been sleeping, suddenly awoke as he was scaled by the piping hot coffee and screamed out in pain.  
“Shrek!” he said as his eyes landed on the green beast. “I- i thought you were still in far far away!”  
“You IDIOT, how would meh and mah family make it okay for yew to sleep in mah land?” Shrek yelled as he exited his home through the front door and made his way towards Donkey.  
“I needed a place to stay man, that's all- I swear!” Donkey shrieked as he got up and began backing away from the ogre.  
“Don’t yew have a home with yah kids and weife?” Shrek asked as he stopped and got into an annoyed parent position.  
“Not anymore, Shrek” Donkey said, a single tear escaping from his eye. “Dragon dumped me. She was sick of my constant talking and thought I didn’t treat the kids right because I was out with you so much. She said I was so estranged I couldn't be their father!” He broke out into tears after that, unable to keep in his copious amounts of emotion.  
“Oh, Donkey… I’m sorry mah man” Shrek said as he got down on one knee and patted Donkey’s sad head.  
“Sorry for cryin so much…” Donkey said in between bursts of tears.  
“Bettah out than in I always seh!” Shrek said. This made Donkey laugh. Donkey loved Shrek for that, he could always make Donkey laugh...  
“Do yah really have no where to goh?” Shrek asked  
“Yeah Shrek… I’m homeless” Donkey said after sniffling, “That's why i’m here! I knew you would take me in if you knew I was hopeless!”  
“Well…” Shrek said before standing up and facing the other direction.  
“Well?? Well what man!?” Donkey exclaimed as he jumped up.  
“Well,” Shrek began again, “Things ave changed since yew used to stay here Donkey. I have a family now- three kids and a whife. There isn’t a room for yah now. I mean, there is tha old outhouse-”  
“I’ll take it!!” Donkey exclaimed, “Thank you Shrek, thank you so much!!!!”  
“Wait a second, Donkey-” Shrek began as he put his hand on Donkey’s head- “If you’re gonna stay here, you’re gonna have to compensate for somethin”  
“But Shrek- I don’t have any money!” Donkey exclaimed.  
“Oh- we can work around that Donkey” Shrek said with a wink. “Do you still know how to give a nice BJ like you always claimed you could?”  
Donkey gasped. “Well, of-of course!” he exclaimed, “but is it really a good payoff for letting me stay here? What about Fiona?”  
“She doesn’t have to know a thing” Shrek said, with a sexual wiggling of the eyebrows. Donkey wouldn’t resist that face.  
“Hows about yew give meh a little sugar to start yah… weekly loan?” Shrek said, before throwing Donkey over his shoulder and bringing him into the old outhouse.


	2. Breaking Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shrek commits his final sin

The day started out like any other. Shrek woke before everyone else up for his early morning vape, wanting to escape the life he was living. Fiona awoke Fergus, Farkle, and Felicia for breakfast, the two year olds now sleeping through the night and acting out their anger like all two year olds do. Fergus would hoist himself right out of bed, little Felicia would roll out, and Farkle would have to be picked up by Fiona due to his weak bones.   
Donkey was snoring out in the outhouse, still not having left the outhouse after a year. This was not a problem for Shrek, for he was still a fan of the weekly blow jobs. Fiona had been suspicious of the arrangement since the first two months had passed and the family had received no monetary compensation. She had a feeling something was up, but couldn't put her finger on it.  
Fiona saw Shrek on the porch as she was putting the kids in their high chairs for breakfast. She dished out some porridge for each, and proceeded to go outside to see what was up with her husband.  
“Something on your mind?” She asked, filled coffee cups in each hand.  
“No” Shrek murmured, gesturing that he did not give a damn about having coffee. Fiona deflated a bit and put the cup down.   
“What’s going on between you and Donkey, Shrek” she asked him, quietly enough that only he could hear.  
“Nothing Fiona!” Shrek exclaimed, raising his voice, “How many times do I have to tell yew this?”   
“You know I hate it when you vape” She told him, arms crossed.  
“Yeah, and yew know I hate it when yew give me lip, woman!” Shrek burst out. Fiona was visibly shaken. Shrek didn’t even try to apologize for his actions. At that moment, Felicia vomited all over her high chair and began crying.  
“Look, we can deal with this shit later, try to grow up in the meantime, okay?” Fiona said with an obvious tinge of anger in her voice.  
Fiona returned inside and removed the crying Felicia from her seat and laid the petite ogress down in her toddler bed. Fiona changed her clothes, gave her a good clean, and put her down to sleep. She kissed her forehead, and returned to the kitchen.  
What she saw changed her life forever.  
She caught Shrek mid-vape cloud exhalation. He was vaping on the two boys, who were coughing up a storm. The room smelled of cotton candy.   
“SHREK!” Fiona shouted, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO OUR SONS?!”  
Shrek did not respond. He simply removed 10 fidget spinners from his pockets and began spinning away- one on each finger. The boys began to cry.  
“SHREK YOU HAVE TO STOP THIS” Fiona hollered.  
“YOU CAN’T MAKE ME CHANGE FIONA” Shrek screamed.  
Fiona quickly picked up the crying boys, one in each arm, and made her way out the door. She whistled with all her might, and soon Dragon appeared. As she swooped down from above, Donkey burst out of the outhouse.  
“SMOOCHUMS!” Donkey screamed, thinking Dragon was there for him. When she looked over and saw him, she scoffed and lit the ground around him on fire.  
“WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING” Shrek screamed at Fiona, barging out of the house.   
“I’m leaving you, Shrek” Fiona cried, mounting Dragon. “I can’t live with a monster like you anymore. Goodbye”  
Dragon took off, leaving the swamp dead quiet, except for the cries from Felicia and the faint crackle of fire from the outhouse.


End file.
